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The difference between sex for youths and oldies.

Read The Lazy Sod's Guide to Sex << Click for more information

Research suggests that young men think of sex every three minutes. Older men cannot remember whether they think of sex or not.

One has to wonder – how many replacement hips have been lost to oldie passion?

Sex in the later years is very over-rated. It has to be otherwise no-one would even bother to try.

It’s a well known fact – older people have sex less frequently than the young. Its not that they enjoy it any less its just that they’ve forgotten how to do it.

For the younger generation sex aids are kinky devices, bought in seedy, back street shops. For the older generation they are the chairlifts that help them up to bed.

Young lovers’ bathe together for the sheer pleasure of massaging each other’s bodies with sweet smelling essential oils. Old lovers’ bathe together because they can’t reach down to wash their own feet.

As a lady grows older she no longer expects to find the perfect man – she begins to lower her standards ‘til eventually it reaches the point where provided he’s still conscious – any man will do.

Youngsters whisper sweet nothings in their lover’s ears. Oldies whisper sweet nothings in their lover’s hearing aids.

Its time to mourn the demise of your sex life when fish net stockings are replaced by support tights.

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